By Enola Wright.
Do you suffer from procrastination?
I don’t know quite why I do it now, as I never did it in my youth. It’s not exactly an ailment or a condition, so there is no point going to the chemist to ask for something over the counter to stem the symptoms. The fact is there is no known magic cure for it. Nonetheless, I’m sure I have it and I know I do it all the time. The dictionary definition for it is ‘procrastination’ to delay or postpone action; put off doing something. It also says that “the temptation will be to procrastinate until the power struggle plays itself out” Yep, that’s me. I promised to write an article for the Mutton Club. I know I can do it, and I know I will do it, eventually. But… Yes that arduous word, ‘but’.
If you are suffering, as I do, from procrastination, the daily dilly-dallying dance of shilly-shallying will be a familiar one. Each time I try to put pen to paper something much more engaging takes its place. First there was the fridge. How could I even think about sitting down to write when the fridge needed cleaning? This was not just any ordinary fridge clean it was one of those super-duper deep steam cleans that took the entire morning. Every item was removed, wiped with a clean cloth and rearranged in perfect height order back into the fridge. I even went as far as to wash all the potatoes, dry them and then put them neatly back into the vegetable tray. It is so satisfying to open the fridge door, stand back and admire your morning’s work. But what about writing that article?
I could write or I could clean out the cutlery draw first. Yes, once the cutlery draw is cleaned my mind would be free to write. So, once again, my writing was put on hold until the cutlery draw was cleaned. The funny thing about cleaning the cutlery is that it could take half an hour or it could take half a day. Well before I knew it, the afternoon had past. There was no time to write because now it was time to prepare the evening meal. My writing would have to wait until tomorrow.
They say that “Fear of failure is often the reason why people procrastinate” What’s to fear about writing? I wonder if it is more to do with the fear of actually doing something positive; the fear of moving forward. Or whether it is the fear of feeling that you can’t do things as well as you could when you were younger. I used to write without thinking thirty years or more ago, now I write nothing. Without a doubt it is easier to do nothing than it is to do something. Doing something takes initiative. It takes energy and requires a certain amount of effort.
Effort. Energy. Focus. Now I am starting to feel tired. Anyhow, I digress… back to the point in question: can I write an article for the Mutton Club? I will answer that, I have a brilliant idea for a great article… but first I have to pair all of the socks in the drawer upstairs.
Read Enola’s thoughts on experience.
Enola Wright is a mother of three, step mum of two and step grandma to three. She writes about how a life changing rare illness affected her as she reached the very top of her career aspirations and how this has bought about a different kind of normal. She founded and runs the UK insulinoma support website.